This will be my summer - A true story

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For years - often despondently - I had racked my mind as to why boys of precisely that age, at the summit of their beauty, fascinate me. Why I honestly love boys, want to treat them tenderly and also desire them sexually. This racking ended when I concluded that I fascinate boys, and children in general. Is it my own, probably never-ending boyishness, the undivided attention I give to them, my selfless friendship, of which they sense the possibilities? Is it because of this that I don't see them at all as adults in the making, in other words as incomplete beings (in the eyes of adults), but instead recognize, admire and stimulate their perfection, their harmony, their beauty? Is it my authenticity, my honesty, my spontaneity, which sets me apart from 'typical adults'? Is it the magical attraction of a manly image, someone who imposes no conditions, requirements or demands? An attraction which promises affection, comradeship, friendship, even love?

source: Story 'This will be my summer - A true story' by Peter N. [edit]; Koinos, 72; Winter 2011